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How to Last Longer in Bed ? We Ask our Doctors

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last longer in bed

How to last longer in bed has to be one of the longest-standing questions in human history. Performance anxiety and premature ejaculation are top of the list when it comes to confidence between the sheets. There is nothing more frustrating than building up to the big event, and boom, it's all over in a few seconds. It is so annoying that the harder you try to slow things down, the faster things seem to happen. Lying there thinking of other things like putting the garbage out makes it worse.

Premature ejaculation (PE) is when the male ejaculates too quickly during sexual intercourse. The standard definition of PE is reaching the point of ejaculation in less than 60 seconds.

A study of 500 couples from 5 different countries discovered that the average time to ejaculate during intercourse is five and a half minutes. The 'normal' time taken to reach orgasm for a man has no actual definition. It is up to individuals to decide whether they are happy with how long things take; however, this is not always in your control. Everybody at some point will 'come' too quickly, which is not a big problem, but if you find it happening more than half the time, you may want to seek help and do something about it.

If you are unhappy with your staying power, remember you are not alone, most guys want to last longer, and most guys won't admit they can't. Unfortunately, there is no cure-all for premature ejaculation in men, but there are plenty of things guys can do to up their stamina and keep going that little bit longer in bed!

A man's average time to ejaculate is around 5 minutes, so if someone brags saying they can last for ages, don't worry, they are probably lying!

Pelvic Floor Exercises for More Sexual Control

Stand in front of a mirror while naked and try and lift your testicles without touching them. The muscles you use for this are your pubococcygeal or PC muscles (aka pelvic floor). Or, when having a pee, try and stop and start the flow. Again, this is your PC muscles at work.

By strengthening their PC muscles, most men can completely cure premature ejaculation. In one study, 40 guys with lifelong premature ejaculation issues undertook PC rehabilitation exercises, and the findings were pretty conclusive. All 40 men had a baseline intravaginal ejaculatory latency time of 1 minute. After this 12-week study, 82.5% of them had regained control of their ejaculation times.

PC rehabilitation is also proven to help men with Erectile dysfunction. A study examining if pelvic floor exercises can restore erectile function in men had remarkably encouraging results. A group of 55 men was given pelvic floor exercises by a physiotherapist, lifestyle advice (intervention group), or just lifestyle advice (control group). After three months, all the men underwent testing, and the intervention group had significantly improved erectile function than the control group. Both groups followed the same exercise plan; after six months, the assessment showed that 40% of men had regained normal erectile function, 35.5% improved, and 24.5% failed to improve.

So, the evidence is pretty conclusive that Kegels (pelvic floor exercises) is a perfect starting point for lasting longer in bed. How to last longer in bed? Strengthen your pubococcygeal muscles!

Don't Drink to Excess.

'Brewer's droop' or 'whiskey dick' as it is also known is a common cause of guys failing to perform. Alcohol dilates your blood vessels meaning blood flows around your body more efficiently. Hoorah, I hear you say, more blood equals harder erections! No, Wider vessels mean that blood can flow freely into the penis, but it flows just as quickly out again, giving you brewer's droop. Most men find that a few drinks do not affect the ability to gain an erection, lighten the mood, and make things a little more relaxed.

In truth, though, alcohol is a depressant, and too much will dampen the mood, kill your libido (and your partners) and make it difficult to achieve an erection. This doesn't mean you have to cut out alcohol totally; most experts advise drinking in moderation for your health in general.

According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), you should not have more than two alcoholic drinks a day for men (one drink a day for women). Your liver can only process and break down at about the rate of one unit per hour. So, if you drink heavily over long periods, alcohol builds up in your system and damages your body and sexual organs.

Alcohol consumption and depression and inextricably linked. Drinking alcohol releases endorphins (pleasure hormones) that bind to opiate receptors in the brain, making you feel good. Unfortunately, even for those who drink moderately, alcohol causes shrinkage to brain areas that deal with cognitive ability and learning, interrupting signals between the brain and sexual organs.

As well as damaging to your brain, liver, pancreas, nervous system, and heart, alcohol plays havoc with your mental health. Specifically, it can lead to low mood and worsen any preexisting mental health issues you may have. Using alcohol to 'drown your sorrows' often buries issues deeper unless addressed.

Alcohol also can decrease testosterone levels interfering with hormone synthesis. It also increases visceral fat, which also reduces testosterone production. 

When you consider alcohol's powerful effect on your mind, body, and soul, it is pretty plain to see how it can adversely impact your sex life. So, how to last longer in bed? Don't drink too much!

Smoking Causes Erectile Dysfunction

It is hardly surprising that smoking is one of the biggest causes of erectile dysfunction. Smoking is the single greatest cause of death and disease in the world. Studies report chronic smokers are 1.5 to 2-timers more likely than nonsmokers to report ED. Importantly, studies also show that quitting smoking, especially in younger men, has a hugely positive impact on sexual health.

Cigarette smoke severely damages your cardiovascular system, and erectile function relies on a healthy vascular system. Smoking reduces your HDL (good cholesterol) and increases your LDL (bad cholesterol). It also raises your total cholesterol and triglycerides (lipids), fatty deposits in your blood system.

Smoking also constricts your blood vessels making it more challenging to gain an erection. High blood pressure, increased bad cholesterol, and damage to the heart is devastating to your sexual health; without good blood flow, you will struggle to get it up.

Giving up smoking has huge benefits for your general and sexual health. Younger guys, in particular, who put enormous importance on their sexual vigor and prowess, will benefit from improved cardiovascular health.  Erections will be easier with increased blood flow helping them gain an erection, have more energy, and feel significantly better.

In general, over half of men over 40 will experience some form of ED Smokers are far more likely to develop ED regardless of age and other conditions. Countless studies and reports support the claim that smoking can cause ED Smoking disrupts the nitric oxide (NO) pathways around the body. NO is a vasodilator released into the blood, causing vessels to widen, increasing blood flow, and lowering blood pressure. Without this vital chemical compound, you simply cannot get an erection, yet another reason to quit smoking!

So, how to last longer in bed? Give up smoking!

Masturbate in Advance

One sure-fire way to last longer in bed is to masturbate an hour or two before sex. Masturbation is completely normal and can help you train yourself to delay things.

One effective method is just before ejaculation to gently squeeze the penis just below the 'head' for 10 - 20 seconds, then carry on. Practice the stop and start method (edging), taking a deep breath before continuing; this will help delay ejaculation. This method can be beneficial, and with practice, you can regain a significant degree of control and last longer in bed!

PE Creams, Sprays, and Wipes

For those who want to last longer in bed, it can be incredibly frustrating for both partners if things come to an end too quickly. Premature ejaculation is estimated to affect up to 39% of all men, and studies into anesthetic creams, sprays, and wipes show them to have the potential to transform men's staying power.

Lidocaine and benzocaine are local anesthetics used to 'locally' numb body areas to relieve pain or for minor surgical procedures. For the treatment of PE, they are available in creams, wipes, and sprays. Some condom companies use small amounts inside their products to help desensitize the penis enough to delay ejaculation.

These products are applied directly to the sensitive areas of the penis and can start working within 5 minutes. An increasing number of studies claim that PE wipes, creams, and sprays can significantly increase the time from erection to ejaculation, meaning you will last longer in bed. This type of anesthetic PE treatment is generally very safe to use, and usually, people do not suffer any severe side effects.

Mild side effects can include mild irritation, rash, and itching; this can occur in either the man or woman unless using a condom. Please take extra precautions using PE creams, sprays, and wipes with condoms. They can weaken the material exposing you and your partner to potential sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. These treatments can cause desensitization for your partner as well unless washed off before intercourse.

Try to use the smallest amount you can to gain desensitization to avoid unwanted side effects. Importantly only use this treatment as directed; there are cases where people have used them for pain relief and cosmetic procedures using far too high a dose. Overuse can cause a potentially life-threatening condition called methemoglobinemia.

Methemoglobinemia is a rare disorder where too little oxygen reaches your blood cells. The condition can come on quickly and cause headaches, shortness of breath, nausea, rapid heart rate, fatigue, confusion, and loss of consciousness.

Drugs Can Cause Erectile Dysfunction

It is not only alcohol that can cause things to flop. Recreational drugs and some prescription drugs can also impact your ability to gain an erection. Drugs such as cocaine, marijuana, opiates, barbiturates, MDMA, LSD, and amphetamines can contribute to erectile dysfunction. However, some people experience the opposite and find sex more intimate and enhanced by using drugs. So, if you want to last longer in bed, our advice would be to steer clear of illegal drugs!

Prescribed Medication for Sexual Dysfunction.

Doctors can use several prescription drugs to combat PE and ED and help you last longer in bed.

  • Antidepressants. SSRIs such as escitalopram (Lexapro), fluoxetine (Prozac), sertraline (Zoloft), or paroxetine (Paxil) can delay orgasm and reduce interest in sex. SSRI medications can make it harder to become aroused, sustain arousal, and reach orgasm. Some people taking SSRIs find they can't orgasm at all. 
  • Analgesics. Tramadol (Ultram) is a powerful pain medication. It also has side effects that delay ejaculation, and some doctors recommend it off-label to treat PE. Side effects might include nausea, headaches, sleepiness, and dizziness. Do not take Tramadol and SSRIs at the same time.
  • Phosphodiesterase-5 inhibitors. These are a group of medications prescribed by doctors to treat ED. Some men find that Sildenafil (Viagra®) or Tadalafil (Cialis®) help premature ejaculation. Side effects might include headaches, facial flushing, and indigestion. Phosphodiesterase-5 inhibitors and SSRIs can be used together for maximum impact.

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Sildenafil (Viagra®) and Tadalafil (Cialis®) can help you recover faster after ejaculation. Why not give it a try!

Exercise for Better Sex

There are countless reasons why keeping fit will help improve your entire sex life and help you last longer in bed.

Exercise Makes You Feel Good.

Body image plays a huge role in how attractive we are to our partners and how we see ourselves. Being more confident within yourself will undoubtedly make you comfortable when you are naked. Furthermore, being self-assured is commonly a powerful aphrodisiac for your partner. Who doesn't like a bit of confidence?

To put it simply, exercising and being physically fit enhance your attractiveness, and increase energy levels. One study discovered that those who exercise 2 to 3 days per week had overall higher self-esteem. 80% of male participants and nearly 60% of females rated themselves above average or considerably above average in sexual desirability.

Exercise Releases Endorphins (so does sex!)

Every time you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which (along with other hormones such as oxytocin) make you feel good. Those who exercise (and have sex) regularly will be aware of 'runners high,' caused by the release of hormones. This feeling becomes addictive, and the more frequently you exercise and have sex, the easier it becomes to go for longer and become aroused. The link between sexual satisfaction and fitness applies to men and women, so dust off those jogging shoes, grab your partner, and go for a run!

Exercise Reduces Erectile Dysfunction

Poor heart health and circulation issues will cause erectile dysfunction. For an erection to occur, the penis must swell with blood, so blocked arteries, high blood pressure, and poor cardiovascular health will certainly not help matters. Exercise keeps the heart pumping healthily, reduces visceral fat, and lowers cholesterol, reducing the risk of erectile dysfunction. How to last longer in bed? Exercise!

Eat Well For Longer Lasting Sex

A healthy diet is imperative to last longer in bed and all-around general health; there is no point in exercising to improve your sex life if you live on fast food and pre-packaged junk. Eating well is pretty simple; however, convenience and the fast pace of modern life make it all too easy to order a pizza or open a packet.


The best thing you can do for your body is to eat fresh homemade food. Fruit and vegetables are nature's fast food. You are simply a peel away from a healthy snack. Vegetables, salad, pulses, rice, and grains are easy to prepare and take very little preparation. Fresh fish is quick to cook and readily available.

You should limit the consumption of animal products, including meat, cheese, butter, and cream. Cholesterol does not exist in the plant world, so by reducing your animal intake, your bad cholesterol will start to lower. Along with exercise, your cardiovascular health will begin to improve. Remember, a better heart and lungs mean better erections!

So, if you want to last longer in bed, look after yourself. With a combination of making the right lifestyle choices, strengthening your pelvic floor, and if necessary, using medicines, men can undoubtedly increase staying power and delay their ejaculation time.

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Disclaimer: The information provided on this page is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. If you have any questions or concerns about your health, please consult a doctor.